KENYAN AND CRAZY

Millennials , as they call them, do not know this feeling. They grew up on text messages and emails. They could snapchat and Facebook message stuff. They could send videos of themselves on whatsapp and all that new tech stuff. Just realized something, they would categorize me as a millennial. Millenial or otherwise I know what that feeling was like, when someone hands you a letter. Whatever the color of the envelope , you could feel the excitement building up inside of you, It could be anyone, mother may be telling you to expect them on visiting day, An aunt may have sent a letter with some money folded inside of it. All this sounds like boarding school behavior, it actually is. The days when people used to dedicate songs to each other on the bottom of the letter. My personal favorite was "I need a girl" by p diddy.  To be totally honest, I never actually was a ladies man in high school. I was in a mixed high school but just having the girls there was good enough. I was...

Over the years I have realized that this is what I would call my 'Vanity Blog', I don't write it to get noticed but for it to echo to myself. I have written things here both in drafts and published posts that I would not say out loud to anyone else, I keep doing it because its like a conversation I have with some one out there. Some one I cant see but I know they are out there. Weird as it sounds I find it therapeutic.  So today is my birthday and I figured, I better just post something about today....... Like many people, I usually get birthday blues. Its usually a feeling that starts a couple of days before my birthday where I think of the fact that now I have to change my age. The number I use to explain my status in life is going up again. I only actually started to get birthday blues a couple of years ago when I moved to Mombasa. Far away from family, friends and the place I could call home. It really brought out the home sickness in me. Thankfully I had made new fr...

It's dark in your mind but it's sunny outside. Your face is downcast but you are surrounded by laughter. There is some happy tool who keeps laughing at his own jokes yet you don't see the fun in them. You could hide behind the fact that you are used to British humor so the slapstick kind annoys you ,but at the very least you should crack  a smile at the blundering buffoon in front of you. Everyone who looks at you sees a blank expression,  it's almost like you are not there. You feel no stimulus , nothing at all makes you jump.  One thing and only one thing makes you "feel". Feel your heart pounding,  your palms sweaty and your muscles more energized. You feel more, alive, more in tune with the world. This one thing that can take different forms wakes you up, calms you down and excites you at the same time.  What is it......I would call them mind altering substances but you would call them drugs.  In this new life that we have created for ourselves you nee...

It's been a while since I wrote on this, mostly because of the writers block but probably because I have been so busy. I'm writing this on the couch next to my five month old son and it's almost midnight.  Those who have been parents before me know this all familiar sight of a child who won't sleep and demands all the attention from you who needs to sleep. I just came from a 13 hour work day and the little one has only sporadically slept during the day, much to his mother's chagrin. I have another long day tomorrow but I just can't sleep to the sounds of him crying the going quiet then starting up again. His mother has tried everything, little guy doesn't want to give up.  I decided to take up the challenge. Walked him around the apartment, to the balcony and back to the living and he is quiet now.  His eyes darting left and right, I decide that maybe an episode of the good wife would be nice. He quickly reminded me that I'm the only who enjoys it and ...

6 am Monday morning, squinting through ghost cum and morning breath trying to get my bearings. The most beautiful feeling you can ever have on a Monday morning is when you realize that you don't actually have to get out of bed. This Monday morning represents the halfway point of my 14 day vacation so what do you think i should do today? Lets start with the new routine I am trying to cultivate, jogging as frequently as possible.  I recently moved from weighing in the triple digits and I sure as hell want to keep it that way so I have decided to sit less and move more. Step one of this is to get myself off of this bed and grab some sweat pants and running shoes then hit the road. I sometimes believe that when I am exercising, it isn't a way for me to lose weight but some time I can take off from the world and just disappear into a rabbit hole until I am exhausted. Today was not an exception, head phones on and my feet to the ground. The sun not fully out but giving enough light...

To GIVE UP, a transitive verb that webster defines as  to abandon (oneself) to a particular feeling, influence, or activity  < gave  himself  up  to despair>. Not something anyone wants to admit but there are times you have given up, you walked into a ace and your heart sank because you just couldn't take another step. I have every now and then but there is always that inner power that pushes me to take that next step. The small burst of adrenaline that pushes my mind to forget the aching muscles that scream in rebellion, to get that little will power I need to move forward. Have you ever heard of the broken heart syndrome, to paraphrase it there are people out there who have died because of a broken heart. After experiencing a great loss or betrayal, your heart just can't take it anymore and stops working. I once heard of a man whose wife passed then he went into deep depression and died as well only 3 days later. He wasn't unwell in any way but they were...

It's 9:00 pm on the last flight out of Jomo Kenyatta international airport to Moi international airport and I'm sipping a cold beer at 23,000 feet. The flip side is I have a cold and I have not had a good nights rest in a while. I am sleep deprived and pretty hungry so it's not all rosy up here. That however, isn't why I am writing this. I am writing this because of a totally different reason. I generally don't pay attention to the safety instructions at the beginning of the flight but this time I did . Why do you ask, because of the male flight attendant. Why would a male flight attendant make me concentrate, well it was late at night and he had probably flown back and forth a couple of times but he still entertained us. The guy got up on the P.A system and gave us an audio presentation worthy of a radio talk-show host. He introduced the captain, first officer and all the flight attendants like he was introducing his fellow band mates and it was refreshing.  I ha...